Hike up the memory lane...

It's summer 2020, I am hiking in the local Montgomery Hill Park, with Sai, Shivani and Vyas - we start a little after 7:30 pm, oh, it's been sweltering hot this summer. But why hike? Since that is one of the very few ways we can get out of the house, smell some fresh air, see some real life outside the 4 walls of home :) Oh wait, before any conclusions can drawn, know that most of the world is under the grip of Covid 19, and many are staying indoors if we can, for some level of safety.

Shivani and Sai are ahead of us, they have their own topics to discuss. Vyas and I are talking about his new Bakugan design, which has become one of the curious topics for me recently. Vyas is very passionate about Bakugans and BeyBlades, and describes his latest idea's factions, features, magical powers, and what not. We are on a downhill, before the great upslope starts. In his excitement, he almost started dragging me, holding my hand.

I go, "Wait, Wait, Vyas! Not too fast, I cannot not keep up, might fall down and break the things in my knee, again!!!".

He gives a blank look, "Why?"

"You know, those metal things could break!! Slow down".

"You always hike, but tell this. You broke your leg 19-20 years back, it's not going to hurt now"

"True, but there is a chance", and I go on...

June 11, 2001. It was a Monday. It feels like it was yesterday. My parents were visiting me in Hyderabad, and I was to goto the railway station to pick them up. I wore the green dress, which was a favorite at that time. The fabric felt snug, or, maybe I had put one some weight since it was stitched.

Maybe the train that was to arrive at 7:30 AM was getting delayed. Finally, it was there. Hugs and a lot of catching up. Cell phones were relatively new in India at that time, and I did not carry one of my own yet. So, an in-person meet was more special than what it is today. My parents had taken a little more than a week off, to attend a relative's wedding (another Priya, who was a cousin of my BIL, Uday), and spend the rest of the time with me. The morning traffic had gotten worse, we did not reach home before 9 or 9:30 am. Ahh, I was getting late for my office. Panic! I was in a hurry, asked them to help themselves around the house, and rushed to office in my new Scooter(Scooter is a bulky MotorBike, in India, not the kids' scooter), a beautiful Blue, Kinetic Style.

There were no critical meetings those days that I would have to be in, I needn't have rushed. The road construction to our still new building behind the Durgam Cheruvu Lake seemed to have been completed. The road was new, smooth, some pieces of stone clanked and clattered as the tyre hit the road. It used to be quite bumpy in the past.

It turned out to be a normal day, like any other. Towards evening, one of my batch mate, Issac Wilson sent a note to our batch asking if someone could drop him near HiTec city, from where he would take an auto to the service center, where his bike was. I volunteered, since I was anyway leaving at 5 pm, since parents were home. We walked to the parking lot, I started my Scooter. Issac climbed on. No sooner did we get to the gate of the office building, than, there was a sudden downpour, un-announced. I decided to drive back to the parking lot and not get caught in the heavy rain. Issac decided to get off at the gate to get another ride to the service center. The rain had gathered momentum.

I drove back to the parking lot which was less than 500 feet away. Suddenly the wheels felt wobbly, weird, and before I knew it, I was on the ground, the 140 CC vehicle over me. A group of colleagues waiting for the bus under a shade, ran over to help me up. First the scooter up, and then me. I could not lift myself. There was someone wearing a raincoat, who asked me to hold him while trying to stand up. And there, that was HELL. No, I couldn't stand and I heard the first scream of the day. A lot of noise and someone asked me if my leg had swollen. I had no idea due to the chudi pants, and my expressions conveyed my excruciating pain. All the chaos bought more folks. From nowhere came Kalpana Krishnamoorthy from Admin/Facilities, calling for the office car to take me to the nearest hospital. Madhu, my friend/roommate, who was working upstairs came running with her bag, as someone informed her too. Folks tried to lift me from where I was, to the back seat of the car, and Oh, My, could the pain be worse? Somehow we made it into the car, Madhu by my side, and while I was lying down, I calmed down a bit, and started to relax. The friendly driver was also chatty. I told Madhu, "Im glad they completed the construction of this road, else, the bump would have made my pain worse!". She was talking of my favorite songs as the car moved along in the rain, which took my mind off the pain. She always knew to say/do the right thing.

It looked like in no time, but we were near the road to Apollo, near Jubilee Hills, which was the closest and best Hospital in the area. Alas, the driver said in his Teluguized Tamil, "Amma, road kulla poga mudiaadhu. Thannni Adaichitirukku". (The road to the hospital was flooded that cars couldn't enter). Madhu suggested Mythri Hospital in Ameerpet, which she and VishnuPriya had been to, recently. So, off the driver changed direction. No flood this time, we could goto the hospital. No sooner did he pull into the drop off, the attenders asked what the issue was, and brought a stretcher in no-time. Now they have to lift me into the Stretcher!!! There started my waves of screams again, everytime my leg moved a bit, life was Hell, On and Off! (Perhaps the staff were used to such painful screams, I had no time to ponder). We waited for sometime in front of the emergency, (or, in the Ortho Lobby).

A thin doctor, with a thin mustache, receding hairline, came to me, with a serious look on his face (that was his normal, I would later come to know) introduced himself as Dr. Mallikarjuna Rao, asked me the background, saw the pumpkin like swelling (my leg has never been slender, but this was too much out of league) ordered an X-Ray and some tests. I was taken to the X-Ray, Madhu whispered to me, "Mallikarjuna is the name of Lord Shiva, who we saw in ShriSailam!". I nodded. It strangely felt good. Back to the Ortho department, the Doc saw my X-Ray and without giving room to any more anxiety, said, "You have a Communited Fracture on your Tibia, good that there are some pieces remaining ;). You will need a surgery, and definitely about 8 weeks of bed rest".

Being a young fool, I simply paid attention to the latter, "What, I can't work for those 8 weeks?" (Mind voice: WTF!!??). Totally dishearted. Remember, I was still comfortable on the stretcher, without moving, and my brain's size was like that of a lizard, that I didn't remember the ordeal just some time back. Ashok Reddy, BaaN's Head of HR/Admin was there too. When I told him, "Im asked to be in bed rest for 8 weeks, how am I going to make it without working?". He said, "Don't worry! Of course, we will provide you a laptop (which was unheard of those days, unless you travel) and you can work from home (that concept did NOT exist those days). Still, I nodded feeling Ok, again, my brain couldn't comprehend what was going on.

More ordeals and waves of pain and screaming as I was moved to the elevator, from the stretcher to the bed, etc. but at some point, I was lying in a comfortable bed. My parents, AAnu and Arul came. My parents had been informed by Anu/Vishnu. Issac could collect his vehicle from the Service Center and came too, to check. They all left later at night. Appa left home, and Amma stayed with me during the night.

On Tuesday, the room was busy, with moving doctors, specialists like Surgeons, Anaesthesists, Nurses, general docs, etc. So many nice people came and checked on me. Latha / Babu mama (Latha would later bring sumptuous lunch everyday, before heading off to work), Vishnu, many of my batch mates. I was still in shock and did not remember much of Tuesday, though the only thing that stood out was, my body, overall was in pain, from the fall. Someone told me that the road in the office, between the gate to the parking lot was constructed smoother than regular roads, maybe to go with the rest of the building's theme, and that I was the 2nd to fall in a couple months, but the worst impacted.

Wednesday was the day of surgery. It was maybe 8 or 9 AM. After one more round of screaming during the move from the bed to the stretcher, I was taken to be prepped for surgery. I saw the friendly anaesthesist who visited me the day before. I told him, "Can you Please please give me anaesthesia before I move out of the stretcher? I normally don't scream, but been yelling too much of late when moved". (Im laughing out loud now, since I do yell a lot these days at my family members :-O - Vyas also gave me a look, as we walked on)

He said, "Priya, this is "Fresh Oxygen". Just breath in once, twice, thrice", And I did, and knew nothing there afterwards. When my senses returned, I thought I saw 2, 3 of everything, everyone. I thought I saw my mom and dad, or perhaps an illusion. I really thought I was a zombie, when I thought I saw someone from the BaaN Finance team, who I didn't have any intro to. My dad was indeed there, and said, "this is Anbarasu, my friend's son. He has come over to say Hello". I thought I said "Hello". It was still foggy. It seems I was in the post-surgery waiting room. Someone moved the stretcher to the elevator, and I was soon taken to my room. It striked me that I was not roaring in pain anymore. Well, some development. This may have been evening 6 PM. I was told the surgery went on for some 6ish hours.

Suji's in laws (Sadhaa Maamaa, Maami, Mala, Chitra) had directly come to the hospital after the wedding was over, waited patiently with my parents till the surgery. The room was filled with many of my friends, batchees and colleagues. All chatting, and very happy to see me coming back in a single piece :-D. Yeah, coming back without screams felt like an achievement. Simple joys in life. Then Dr. Mallikarjuna Rao came with his crew, saw the 2 dozen something people, many shoes, and ordered everyone out (Something like, after-surgery patients are prone to getting infected- Out!!!". He explained what they did, connected all the broken bits of bones in my right tibia, with some unused slices of bones taken from my hip and fibula(behind the tibia) - with a metal rod and a multitude of screws. The X-Ray now looked like an inverted Eiffel Tower. VishnuPriya and MPradeep were returning from the blood draw center in some other part of the city, carrying 1 or 2 packets of blood which Pradeep had donated (In Pradeep's own words, "Biryani Pottalam madiri irunduchu, Priya!" :-D . I thought Vishnu was very brave driving him and the blood packet all the way :-D.

The hospital life was for about 2 weeks. A physical therapist came over and taught me an exercise to repeat 100 times a day, since intense exercises were not possible with the cast. Dad would go home every night and be back in the morning. Mom stayed with me. So many visitors. NAnuradha, who was newly married, was in town for a few days, and gave me a tip to make sure the blanket underneath me should be straightened so it does not hurt me (Simple, Impactful tip). My roomies had commendable cooking skills and good heart, they would always drop by with breakfast or stop for an evening chat, most days. My new colleague Lakshmi stopped by with her husband Sashi, and filled the room with such hilarious stories and jokes that the stitches on my hip hurt, laughing out loud. ("Guys, will you please stop - it hurts!!!".) Nevertheless, it created a great bond wich was to continue for the rest of my years in BaaN. Pedro/Karthik brought a few of his DC (Im thinking Warehouses/DC/plant - logistic terms) colleagues and it was great meeting them for the first time, though we interacted over mails. Many of my batchees/friends would stop by in groups, all making the day a bit more fun!

It was not all laughs as it sounds like. I was quite split between being independent and now dependent. Since I was immobile, I needed help for my basic, daily abulitions. And, as luck would have it, I got my periods between these, making me actually depressed, for being dependent. On weekends, the (quite inexperienced) medical interns would perform their experiments on me, like poking multiple places to find a vein to stick the IV in, upto my entire hand paining. I had to tell them once, "Can you find someone who can get this done without trial or errors? This is hurting me too much."

Prem was by herself in Coimbatore, my Atthai with her, while parents were with me. She was still in college, and was initially teary, getting only scattered info about me. Later, Appa could catch up with her, she felt better when she knew I was safe. Chitra was in touch about my status, and would continue to motivate me till I would walk normally again, or just listen when I sulk :) - she relentlessly asked me to log my walking everyday in excel, for many months/years to come. Suji would send some of her favorite songs in CDs for me.

Suji was newly married at the time, and her in laws visited me a few times with either Shekar or by themselves. Sadaa Maamaa saw all the needle punctured scars on my hand, and would massage my hands as he spoke. Maami was so moved, " Evalo azhagaa, style aa nee andha scooter ii ootindu aathukku vandhey, enn kanney patuduthu dee" (I had visited them on Sunday). I felt so bad that she felt so bad :( They traveled some 25-30 kms to check on me a few times during their stay in Hyderabad. Mom's Chitappa and Maamaa, though not overly outspoken to each other, visited me together. One fine Sunday evening, Mr Ramam, the Head of BaaN Hyderabad visited, chatted a bit, said they were working on revamping that smooth road, and that I did not need to worry about returning to my spot in the team. Sounded relieving. Priya of the current days would definitely have had more questions and statements, I now think. I saw my dad crying for the first time, when he had to leave to CBE, while I was still in the hospital. My mom extended her leave and continued to stay with me.

I remembered having to take some 10-12 medicines everyday, some iron/multi-vitamin, but mostly the painkillers. A couple of days before discharging me, the sutures on my knee (stitches) were removed, and from there, the doctor started observing slight infections in the area, which delayed the discharge. I had a series of pains (metallic pain, which I rememebr the most - I can feel it, can't define it ) throughout. The doctor was quite surprised that I had a list of specific questions before I got discharged, which looks quite normal nowadays, but probably was not the norm then, I didn't know. His last statement was, " You will not be able to squat, which is ok, since there are some obese folks too, who can't squat!". The naive me didn't feel anything then, but, the Priya of current days, would have questioned that for (a) insensitivity towards people, as well as (b) is that the most encouraging thing you can tell to young blood (22-23 years old)? Nevertheless, those were simple days, and I did not think too much. Still being carried in a stretcher upto the 3rd floor where my apartment was located, my only fear was if I would roll down and fall down the floors. :-D (I thought I could see the road if I peered through the open stairs, at some points)

I hope readers of today do not assume I was lazy enough not to walk with the crutches. I was adviced not to do so for many weeks after the surgery. I guess healing took it's own time (in India) those days, and neither the doctor nor the patient was in a hurry. While still in Hyderabad, I did try walking with crutches for a few minutes a day, as adviced by my physical therapists. It was an ordeal though. The infection on the suture area actually increased, and the doctor's assistant would dress it up everyday with anti-infection-something. When the infection turned into an ugly Gape/Opening, the doctor finally interfered, and asked me to come in for a mini surgery to close the gape. My plan to goto Coimbatore was delayed. After the mini-surgery (again, Maithri)I was adviced by medicos that it would be risky for me to remove the metal implants in future, should another fall/injury happen - this got imprinted in my head. A combination of many things, I could not goto sleep late into the nights. I would get hungry overnight, but Amma said it was not a good habit eating at midnight :) During the day, mom gave me company; my adorable roomies and friends gave company during evenings. I started reading more books (I remember Madhu gave a book, a vintage where the lead lady broke her legs when her horse fell down; her adoring maid combed her hair till it was shiny; and some dark incidents in the attic/cellar)

A colleague, Tamidala RaviKumar Reddy, send me his cell phone to use while he was out traveling to the NetherLands. Hurrah! An opening to the outer world. My roommates also sent the number to close friends outside Hyderabad, and I was happy talking to them. I even remember once talking to Gowri one night, while he was in the US. I realized that cell phones were one greatest invention of the 20th century, and that it would soon become inevitable, but didn't know what to expect from it from the coming days. Little did I know how connected I was going to be with phones in future (thinking of the product I work on, now). It just brought everyone closer.

Chitra visited me from Bangalore, and stayed with me one weekend. All these felt great, being bed-ridden :)

Then, my train journey to Coimbatore (maybe in mid July?) was carefully planned out. Appa returned to Hyderabad in a few days, to help plan the move to Coimbatore, the stretcher, and all. Being the meticulous man that he was, the tickets were reseverd from the Main terminus, Hyderabad (so there be sufficient time to board, instead of the 2-3 minutes in Secundrabad). The meticulous man that he was, checked out the location of the Bogey/ seat vicinity to the doors, a couple of days before, by visiting the location. He even requested the Engine Driver on the day of, and ensured that the engine would start after only after the stretcher entered the cabin safely ;) Thanking my good old roomies, I headed to CBE.

Prem, took the help of Sundaram Uncle and Diwakaran uncle, to plan the Ambulance - as soon as the train reached CBE, to Ganga Hospital, the leading Ortho Hospital in Coimbatore at that time. Consultation later, I went home, and it was quite a sight for all to see me, still in stretcher and support. Atthais, relatives and neighbors who would come home would just cry. On the other hand, I felt terrible with everyone pitying me, and in my first Ortho visit that afternoon, we asked suggested modes of travel. Since then, proper crutches(4 legged one), travel by auto, a little more independence. Manoj, my nephew would come home after school on almost all days. He was one of my big motivators to walk back again, he was quite vocal in encouraging :)

While Appa was back in Hyderabad, Prem had prepped up my room with a New Bed and Fan. She had also converted the attached bathroom to have a western toilet, with help from Sundaram Uncle and a neighbor. Prem and her friends made up for the company that I missed. My Physical Therapists Balachandar and someone else, were just my age and that was a good help. Lots of therapy, exercises, motivation later, I was walking again, though limping. However, it was a long journey. In between, Vishnu visited me before her wedding. I read many books, watched many movies (remember watching Devar Magan yet another time, and exclaiming how neither Kamal nor Shivaji overacted, rather ogling at Kamal, HehHehHe), emailed many emails, caught up with friends, tested my cooking skills on Prem ( college lunch box). Continued the Long Distance MDBA from Symbiosis. This was also the time of 911; I remember the intense scare when we couldn't reach Suji for atleast 12-16 hours after the incident. Thankfully, she did not board her usual train from NJ to the Twin Towers that day due to a different delay; her later train was stopped, and they were ferried back to NJ, apparently. Wow.

Being outside home or outside a secure environment was raw exposure. I was used to strangers, randomly suggesting wierd cures for my pimples during my college days, which is very common in India, especially in TamilNadu - good intentions, but would leave the person very low (especially if you were a teenager, or just young and stupid :) ). This time, I seemed to be attracting unsolicited advice and comments on how it was a pity for an unmarried female to endure broken bones, or to limp, and how bad a decision it was to get a surgery instead of going to Putthoor. Well, we all receive insensitive comments at different points in life. However, this helps develop immunity, patience, and perseverance, I believe. Just makes us better than what we are.

I returned to Hyderabad, just after Deepawali that year, in time for my first semester exams of MDBA, resumed work, and life did seem to be coming back to normal. Or, did it? Long story short, I had become more insecure. It took many years, wonderful friends, Appa, Amma, and finally, Sai, to help, rather push me to overcome my mental hurdles, and be myself again. And, I don't complain about the journey. I have learnt important lessons, recognized positive relationships, most importantly, learned to be self-reliant. Done several challenging hikes (Half Dome, Mt Diablo, Mission Peak, etc.) , don't crib about walking long distances, don't take anything in life for granted. However, I am rather forgetful. I do lament on long hikes ("Why should I do such difficult things - I'd rather stay back! Grr! ) or get scared of simple things. Earlier, Sai would remind me that I've done tougher things, but he got used (fed up, rather ;) ) to my lizard brain, that he has left it to me to remember those, nowadays :). As for the Kinetic Style, my friend Vinod would dutifully take it to Service while I was in Hyderabad, where, it was UnUsed. Then, I took it to CBE, and my dad used it for a few years.

Present. Strangely, Vyas who is very talkative on our walks, has been listening, uninterrupted. He said, "you should walk faster". It was actually darker, and we needed to get home before it gets fully dark. It was just 10-15 minutes of recollection, we were close to the foothils, but it felt like forever. Strangely, I could recollect everything vividly. I may have left many details/names, but I remember the crux, probably, since it continues to shape me.